Lisa E. Photography ... the blog

Thursday, September 15, 2011

"Life's about changin, nothin' ever stays the same..."

Well friends, two months worth of absence has certainly killed any momentum this little endeavor has gathered. Suffice it to say that life as I know it has been turned upside down and nothing seems to make sense all of the sudden. I am currently spending time with family far from my home in the beautiful Pacific Northwest. Though I miss the green and the coast and my home dearly this break has been necessary. I have been taking lots and lots of photos and hope to be able to get back to work on my photography business very soon but that work may not be able to include this blog, at least not for a bit. The things going on in my life right now compel me to be spending my time very differently and the story in my heart that I have to tell is no longer very consistent with the beautiful photography that I love to shoot and the stories that I love to tell with the use of my photographs is not at a very beautiful place. That fact in and of itself is not something I am ashamed of or trying to hide. Life is not always beautiful and many lives these days are sadly too full of the ugliness that our world is so full of. As I sit here writing this from the East I am surrounded by flooding and devastation. In my month or so here I have experienced my very first earthquake, the outskirts of a hurricane that devastated my coastal neighbors to the North and South and now extreme rain and flooding all around the area where I was born and raised. Life is in fact ugly. This is not new. However, no matter how common the story we must never forget that to the people, the families, and the lives affected the story is always brand new no matter how many times they hear it, it is always raw, it is always devastating and life changing. This is my upside down life. A story so common these days it's easy to think it's not worth telling, but to me it is new, it is raw, and it is personally devastating. Job loss; families divided; personal loss of family members, pets; divorce; addiction; financial insecurity; and tumultuous weather patterns -- you name it whatever your story it is no less devastating than another persons, it is simply different. My story falls into a few of those categories as so many other stories do and I can only hope that I will have brighter days and a brighter outlook in the future. Brighter days that will allow me to share images of hope and life as it does in fact go on. Photography is my passion this little endeavor has been a dream of mine for so long I cannot even tell you when it began anymore I can only tell you that I will not abandon it, I simply must, yet again, focus my efforts elsewhere - hopefully for only a short amount of time. Dreams die hard, this little dream of mine will not go quietly and I will be return to it one day when I have more life to breath into it again.

Monday, July 18, 2011

Where is my inspiration....

So, I took a little break and tried to clear my head. I tried to reconnect with some friends and family that have slipped a little out of reach since our massive move. I cleaned, which tends to be good for my soul. I took long walks on the beach and I spent hours just sitting and playing with my daughter. And still I can't find it. Still, it feels empty.

I feel whole when I have purpose and direction and when people need me. I feel whole when i give in to the free spirited, wanderer in my soul. I feel whole after a hard, productive day at work. I feel whole while being creative. The utilitarian in me gets bent out of shape a bit when the pleasure seeker in me tries to triumph. The creative, free spirited side of me gets bent out of shape when everything becomes so utilitarian. This yin and yang, this balancing act is something I have become painfully aware of only in recent years. This seemed a much more natural process, something that worked it self out in the past. These days it is a much more conscious effort to maintain the balance of the necessary things and the things that are just plain good for the soul.

So, I have begun to list things that really make the very core of me tremble with joy and put my soul at ease
.
Here is the beginning of what is shaping up to be a long, long list:

The Ocean

Sunshine

Friends and Family, this little girl

Singing, Nature

and

.... wait for it ...

Photography.

I am so inspired daily by all of the beauty around me that I am happy as a clam behind that lens, shooting life away, capturing every moment and holding on to it dearly so as to never forget. Not one single moment. And then it hit me. All at once. Inspiration. There it is. There it has been all along. In the little daily things that make my heart sing. It is this that makes me who I am, this walking contradiction, this tigh-rope blanancing act of a practical modern day gypsy. Someone I am proud of being. I don't need to look so hard for the things that are right in front of me, always there, steady and constant and beautiful. This is my inspiration.

Monday, June 27, 2011

day fourty four....

I've skipped a few days. I have been making this such a chore and a commitment that I have already begun to see this part of it as work - already losing site of why I am here in the first place. The words have gotten less and less inspired and I have been letting the frustration of the lack of take off get to me more than I should. So, as promised in the beginning there would be changes, here they come. From now on I will not be doing daily posts. It has made this too much of a chore, versus a labor of love. Most of the posts don't really have any substance or any personality behind them. I feel very few of them really tell anything about who I am or what I am trying to do beyond the cut and dry explanation of it all. I hope to just get one post a week that is meaningful. Also, This will be taking a little more of a personal tone instead of being simply about the photo side of things. One thing that I learned from the contest (I did not win) is that anyone can sit and talk about black and white things like business success or not and stats of page visits and things but there is no human relate-ability aspect in that. The entry wanted links to your family blog and the photo you chose was to be featured on that blog with a link to the contest blog. I directed the judges to this blog, not my private family blog where it is all about us and the posts are much more heartfelt and inspired -- sorry guys but there are too many creepies out there, my family members and friends, almost all of whom are at a great distance from us, should not suffer because I can't trust the Internet at large. So, my family and friends have private viewership rights to the family blog. It isn't for the www to see. This is how I got to this place.... I couldn't put my finger on why I didn't feel good about entering the contest or why I don't like all of the "vote for me" and sponsorship messages from tons and tons of blogs out there and why my favorite blog is my favorite because the images and the words are inspired, inspiring and beautiful. It is obvious that the images and words come from the heart not a chore of a self imposed daily post in the hopes that it will help generate some happenings. Well, it is totally fine for some that is not who I am nor how I want my blog to be. This isn't about that for me and I can now say it felt wrong because it is wrong for me. It just doesn't fit. I am sure you could tell from the tone of the contest post that I wasn't exactly into the idea but I do think I need to start being more active and get out there a bit more so I tried something outside of my normal comfort zone. I chose wrong. The contest is great and wonderful and some great images came out of it and that's great. But it also is a lot about their readership, about their sponsorship, advertising, and their bid to get votes for other blog related contests. All things I really don't care about and don't intend to make this about. I am not saying it's wrong. This is obviously working for many blogs and there are plenty out there who the blog generates revenue for their families and businesses. I am not knocking that, that isn't the point. I am more so scolding myself for trying to fit into a place I knew I didn't fit all along. This blog is simply meant to be a venue, an outlet, to express my passion and creativity and to help my clients get to know me, my work, and my outlook a bit more. Thus far I am not sure I would be sending the right message on those accounts.....

So, things are changing a bit. 44 days into it I feel is long enough to know that this original direction isn't working very well. Sorry for the absence but it took a little time away to see that this needs to be something I enjoy. Starting today.